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Unanswered QuestionsBig Pimple After sending out a request for any last-minute questions, I ended up receiving an avalanche of queries. I tried packing lots of replies into the final article, but some subjects ended up on the cutting room floor. Unfortunately, most of the questions were unanswerable -- e.g., "When will the next album come out?", "Will the Chicks perform in ___?", "What happened to the extended edition of Shut Up and Sing?", "When are the Chicks going to release another video?", "Why hasn't Natalie responded to my love letters?". Not even the Dixie Chicks know the answer to some of those questions. There were also lots of questions directed at the Chicks that I didn't have the opportunity to have answered. And there were some I just want to ignore. ("What does Emily smell like?" -- really?) But there were some questions directed at me that I have attempted to answer below: * Q: What was the most surreal experience of the whole time you were with The Chicks? A: I mentioned a few of the more bizarre experiences in the farewell article. Surfing with Emily and Natalie comes to mind. Carrying Emily's bra. Singing a karaoke duet with Natalie. Seeing fans with signs at concerts with my name on it. But the no-boundaries nature of our conversations stick out the most. One odd topic involved my hypothetical future son’s samurai sword. During the last day of the tour, the Chicks and I were discussing parenthood and somehow landed on the subject of whether I think boys should be circumcised for non-religious reasons. (My wife wants to snip, but I wanted to leave my son intact, especially because of the high risk of infections.) Natalie, who sympathized with my opinion, talked to me about how to avoid the risks – go to a urologist’s well-lit office the next day! – and shared her research on the ultimate health benefits of circumcision. I left the conversation converted. (Dear future son of mine: If you resent the loss of your foreskin, blame the Dixie Chicks!) * Q: What are the chances we'll see a video of Natalie singing "Rehab" at her Halloween party? A: I filmed a lot of video that MSN didn't end up using for various reasons. I think I filmed Natalie singing "Rehab" at the Halloween party but the video quality probably isn't great since I was too busy laughing. I'd have to ask Natalie's permission to share the video, however, so we'll see. * Q: Where is the best place to sit during a Dixie Chicks concert? A: Most audio experts will tell you that the front row in a concert hall is not the best place to be; you should be at least a few rows back to receive the ideal auditory experience. That said, Martie is wonderful about acknowledging people who are waving to her, dancing, or holding up signs -- mainly because she's most likely to have the time and free hands to say hi. So if you want one of the Chicks to acknowledge your "Voice Inside My Head" tattoo on your face, I'd sit as close as possible to Martie. * Q: Did you ever get to play another game with Natalie (after the Yahtzee incident)? A: No. But I don't think that was because Natalie banned me from playing Yahtzee with her. (Or so I would like to believe.) * Q: What was the funniest moment? A: The "Fresh Air" experience: http://dixiechicks.msn.com/article.aspx?cp-documentid=595836. After I saw Martie giggling, I couldn't keep a straight face if my life had depended on it. I will never forget that moment when Martie and I had tears in our eyes. * Q: Do you think you will maintain contact with the Chicks after this all ends? A: I'm sure we might email each other. But they have a million friends, so I doubt I'll get an invite to their next Bat Mitzvah. You have to keep in mind that while they might have enjoyed my company, I represented a huge invasion on their privacy and was a minor nuisance, what with my constant flashing camera and persistent questions. I think some people get the impression that I am best friends with the Dixie Chicks and that we have slumber parties and drink milk and cookies while watching John Hughes films. But it's not true - we have hot cocoa and cupcakes, not milk and cookies. * Q: Was it hard being away from your wife as a newlywed? A: Always. * Q: Is there anything that you were hoping would happen but didn't? A: Gareth, Martie's husband, and I spent a lot of time talking smack about our respective Scrabble skills. Initially, we vowed to play $100 a game. Over time, that number escalated. But we never ended up playing a game. (Perhaps we were both scared of losing hundreds of dollars.) * Q: Is there a distinct moment when your respect for the Chicks rose? A: There were plenty of moments. Here's one: during the rehearsals for the Accidents and Accusations Tour, the Chicks were thinking of a new song to cover for the tour. I suggested Prince's "Raspberry Beret." I thought it was a good idea. I've never heard anybody cover it. Plus, it has string parts that Martie could play. But Martie asked me if the lyrics were meaningful. I said no. She then rejected the idea. That made me appreciate the idea that the Chicks do not pick their cover songs lightly. * Q: Why don't you write a book about your experiences? A. I'd love to. Know any interested publishers? * Q: Do you have a favorite Dixie Chick? A: No. I was prepared to. But I honestly don't, even though I have different bonds with all three. Emily's sense of humor is probably the most similar to mine. (Only Emily would think of posing with a bottle of Vaseline after winning five Grammy awards.) Natalie and I probably have the most to talk about, mainly because we both listen to Howard Stern and have strong opinions about random subjects. And Martie is probably the most open and friendliest. But choosing my favorite Dixie Chick would be like choosing my favorite child or my favorite body part. * Q: Would you entertain the idea of blogging for the Chicks again? A: Because I feel a deep loyalty to the Chicks, I would seriously consider anything they wanted. But if the Chicks ever had the need for another blogger, I think maybe it would be better to have somebody else do it, so the world can get to know the Chicks through a different sent of eyes. * I tried to get as many questions as possible. For those that I didn't have a chance to answer, I will send you a reply through a Ouija board or a Magic 8-Ball. Comments (46)
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